What makes a Final Fantasy Hero: Part 2.2: Big Players

Part 2.2 is going to poke fun at the main characters from the PS1 era of Final Fantasy as well as the spinoffs from FF7.

I posted this as a joke to friends a long time ago but now sharing on my blog. One thing I notice is that most of these characters is they somehow have alot girls pining over them or guys pining over the female lead.

Be warned, there are major spoilers in every game I mention. So if you haven't played a certain Final Fantasy that you plan to play in the future. Skip the character entry.

Final Fantasy 7 has this ex-SOLDIER turn merc named Cloud.

He was hired by an rebel group to take down an evil corporation. Later on, he went on the hunt for the killer that burn down his hometown named Sephiroth.

So how big a player is he? For start, he caught in a love triangle between his childhood friend who is a martial artist/bar keep named Tifa and a flower girl he met at the start of the game named Aeris/or Aerith.(later games change her name)

However Cloud is kind of a jerk and doesn't bother to make a move on the two girls that are trying to get his attention.

Sadly, Aeris(ith) dies midway in the game. Tifa does live Cloud under the same roof in the sequel movie, taking care of orphans.

There is a scene midway in the game where Cloud gets pulled out of his hotel room and goes on a date. Depending on your actions throughout of the game, you get a date with one of the four different characters. You have his two main love interests, Tifa and Aeris. The 3rd option is this ninja girl called Yuffie. The 4th option is big man Barret. *Hears female slash writers giggling* However the date with Barret isn't anything romantic and Barret mainly hangs out with Cloud for the night and asks why he doesn't make a move towards his two love interests.

There's also a girl that's head over heels after Cloud save her with CPR. She's a very minor character that doesn't show up much.

There was a member of Barret's rebel group that likes Cloud. She along with most of the members of Barret's group die pretty early in the game.

Off Course, Cloud had a serious conversion with Terra about flowers in Dissidia.

Even men want Cloud. To get a certain item, Cloud had to get in a tub with all these muscle heads. Much to his discomfort.

Early in the game, Cloud had to save his friend by disguising himself as a woman. Depending on what items you got that to help dress up. Cloud be the Don's personal woman for the night.

Don freak out once he learn the girl he pick was really a guy.

In the mid-2000s, Final Fantasy 7 had several spin offs. They got a CGI sequel movie, a cellphone game based on the Turks that never came America, and several others.

One spinoff was called Dirge of Cerberus. It was a 3rd person shooter game starring Vincent. A mysterious quiet Halloween-theme character from the original game who got his own solo game.

So how big a stud is he? Well he knew the villain's baby mama but she left Vincent for a creepy scientist dude.

The ninja girl Yuffie got flustered when he told her thank you.

Vincent greeted a girl called Shalua by looking at her boobs.. I mean ID badge to see what organization she's in. Yeah in one cutscene where he meets her, the camera pan across them before it focus on her ID badge.

There is an evil redhead that jab her hand in Vincent's stomach. He recovered afterwards from that attack.

Another spinoff is a prequel game called Crisis Core, starring Zack.

Zack is a man in SOLDIER who became best buds with Cloud. He got capture and experimented on but he escaped with Cloud. He dies by getting shot down. He was a posthumous character that was only seen in flashbacks in the original game.

So how big of a lady killer is he? Well Aeris' old boyfriend that she mentions is Zack himself. In the source game, Aeris even mention how Zack was an open flirt.

He is often seen with this Turk girl and try to asked her for dinner. Turks are Shrina's personal hitman group.

Even in a completely different universe. He asked Aqua out from Kingdom Hearts in this funny scene  

Final Fantasy 8 has the gunblade merc, Squall.

He is a merc who is trained to fight evil sorceresses.

So how big a play boy is he? Well he stole his rival's girlfriend and has a teacher is hot for her student and wants to drag him into the school's secret area.(She's only a year older) 

The funny thing is, he's not even trying to grab their attention and act like a jerk to them and yet, they're crazy about him.

Does he seem interested?

However Squall's story is started as anti-social who learn to be more open towards people.

Also his main enemy walks around with a large midriff.

Even Lightning in Dissidia had a flirty encounter quote about giving a lesson to the schoolboy.


Final Fantasy 9 has the theater actor/skirt chaser, Zidane.

So how big a Casanova is he? Well hee is a very open pervert and has a very chivalrous nature towards girls. He has to plan around because he asked a girl on a date and another on the same day. The one he's really into is the princess he "kidnap". He one time cop a feel on her and claim it was an accident. Zidane very different from your average FF Hero

Later on, 6-year old has the hots on Zidane and she's jealous of the princess.

Midway in the game, they had to cross this village and the only way is going to this tribe's wedding. The princess agrees to "wed". It led to a funny scene. (Seems the video uploader rename Zidane's name)

In Dissidia, he had the most interesting lines to the ladies. He hesitating fighting against towards Terra due to his chivalrous nature. Wants to date Shantotto. Said that Prishe's mouth is part of her charm. Tells Lightning "Would you go easy on me?" Tifa asked what is Zidane staring at, well maybe he's staring at your large...eh, materia.